Hallway to Nowhere

Tag: faith

  • Letter To R

    I doubt this will ever be sent to OR read by R. Here goes:

    I’m sorry if I’ve sounded harsh, judgmental, or dismissive of your choice of graduate school. I do not mean to be. In previous times, your choice of attending a divinity school over law school would not trouble me as much. But these are different days than even five years ago. You are 28. You are LGBTQ. These two things are worth noting, in my opinion. Your age makes you a bit older, which is good but also gives you a time factor. You might feel right now that you have all the time in the world to explore your options and even change your mind. The dire straits forced upon the world by the climate crisis will directly impact your generation front and center, though all of us on the planet will have to reckon with it. There is an urgency to everything that was lacking in my day. We are running out of time for everything. We do not have the same luxury to make false starts.

    Second. You are LGBTQ. You have said several times that you don’t intend to become a minister but intend to use this as a tool to continue your work in community organizing and held up William Barbour as an example. But William Barbour is able to be so effective partly b/c his organizing grows out of his deep and abiding religious faith, as well as his wonderful humanity. As an LGBTQ individual, I fear that you will struggle to find a place in a community-any community-once you receive your M.Div. It is NOT getting easier for LGBTQ individuals in this country right now in ANY respect but most especially so vis-a-vis the faith community in many Christian denominations. If I  had seen a calling  to become a minister, I would feel less trepidation at what potentially awaits you.  I fear for your future, though. It will a hard road, I predict. The William Barbours and MLKs of the world have it very difficult when they are hetero and have a strong faith. What vilification awaits you?

    But perhaps I will be wrong. You might have a conviction I know not of already. OR you might have your own personal “Damascus road” experience that will give you strength, faith, and a resounding voice to speak such truth to power that that those who would castigate you (impiously) in the name of their god would at the very least hear you. I hope that I am. But whatever befalls you, I wish you the best . I  will follow your progress. You are one of your generation’s voices. I’m happy I got to know you for a bit. I hope you succeed in your endeavors.

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

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  • Finding No Comfort At A Christian Candlelight Vigil

    Finding No Comfort At A Christian Candlelight Vigil

    This week has left me saddened and dispairing over my encounters with the Christian community in my small town. Here is what I’ve encountered here in the Bible Belt:

    First earlier in the week after the Charlottesville protest, I was speaking to a friend on transit. This person is somewhat elderly and has a devopmental disability. She was frightened and concerned that the violence she had witnessed might come to our small town. I was reassuring her that she was safe and that I believed she need not fear. She patted my hand and thanked me, saying “God bless you.” The transit driver then interjected into the conversation to inform her that I did not believe in god and that I was laughing at her words. All I had said in response to her was a simple “Thank you.” I would never hurt her by ridiculing her beliefs, nor would I try to distress her. She was alarmed already and his words just added to her fear. I attempted to assuage her concern and not inflame the situation. All I said to the driver was to remind him that the First Amendment also applies to atheists, after she had departed from the bus. He then said that it only applies to people who believed in god and that I should be deported (because I’m atheist).  This was said in all seriousness.

    The more I thought about this encounter, the more disturbing I found it. First, that he should use another person’s distress to target me seemed extremely callous. This passenger should not have been subject to more reason for confusion. She was already anxious and upset. She did not need to be brought into his dislike of my atheism. That is extremely uncalled for and beyond the pale. Second, he showed me that I have misread his character. He is a self-proclaimed “good Christian” and conservative Trump supporter. We have engaged in what I thought was good-natured banter in the past. But, while I am known to be a progressive activist, I have never crossed the line into attacking someone personally for his/her/xir beliefs. I firmly believe that the rights of everyone to have their own political and religious beliefs should be respected and that diversity is something to be valued.I don’t expect everyone to agree with me on politics, religion, sexuality, or any other subject. Indeed, I TRY to seek out and engage others with opposing views, not to  change their minds by debate but to find out how others think and feel. I don’t want to live in my own little bubble. At the same time, though, I do let them know who I am and what I espouse. But I also accompany this by kind actions and compassion.

    So, feeling shaken already by yet another disconcerting brush with Christianity here in the South, I attended a candlelight vigil last night. It had been advertised on FB and was held at a local church. I had not realised that this was to be religious (Christian) service, as the church where it was held had been the site for other nonreligious activites I had previously attended and it was not mentioned in the advert. But I resolved to stay, enjoy the beautiful hymns, and find some peace and comfort with others.  I also wanted to hear that  local Christians were other than my recent experiences would allow and not represented by those who would attack and exclude others.

    This is what I heard. I say this with the hope that despite my attempt to be there as a fellow human being and seeker of peace that I misconstrued the message. There were four pastors officiating, each representing a different church and leading a different segment of the service. The first gave a rather standard talk on peace, using the familiar word of Francis of Assisi. The second, an African preacher, was much more inspiring, using  fire and eloquence. I felt hopeful. THEN came the third pastor on the topic of love. He spoke of how Christians are supposed to love EACH OTHER and not criticize other Christians. I waited  to hear his expansion of this into how Christians were to treat ALL people. But that message never arrived. Instead, he reiterated several more times that Christians were one body and were to love their CHRISTIAN neighbors and treat them well. He was conspicuous (to me, at least, as the non-Christian there) by his deafening silence on how Christians are to treat those of other faiths or of no faith at all. Then came the fourth pastor who talked about justice. After a rather vague account of Judas’ betrayal of Jesus, which seemed to have little connection with his theme of justice (perhaps I’m just obtuse), he went on to say that Jesus-and his father also by extension-loves CHRISTIANS and made it abundantly clear that he loves them above we lesser beings who don’t believe. As per the previous pastor, he said this three times, using different passages from the Christian New Testament. And again, no mention at all that presumably god also loves those who are other then Christian.

    I left the service feeling  alone , beleaguered, and saddened. I had hoped to hear a message of comfort and hope for all humans. Instead I came away with the understanding that the attacks I had experienced at the hand of “good” Christians were part and parcel of the culture of this region. I really don’t like to believe this but am slowly coming to think that those whom I DO know to embody the best teachings of Christianity in their words and deeds, who are compassionate, kind, and loving towards ALL, are anomalous. To freely aid a stranger, comfort the lonely, and help anyone in need…well, here at least, these words only seem to apply to other Christians.

    I don’t think I’ll be converting.

     

     

  • Faith and Office

    So. I get an email from Hillary telling me how she has picked Tim Kaine to be her VP. As a Virginian  I’m happy, though I had hoped she’d pick Elizabeth Warren. But something has been irking me. She made a point of telling me how he and his had joined a church and built a home centered around faith. And this annoys me why? Because I do not think his faith has anything to do with his ability to govern, unless I’m missing something and churches ARE now teaching classes. (Given the current political atmosphere, I fully expect that some Evangelical churches probably are doing that very thing.)  I long for the day when a political candidate does not feel obliged to take a faith-based litmus test in order to run for public office in the US, as if being a good Christian automatically confers greater executive, legislative, or judicial skills. I say “good Christian” because, despite there being Jewish and even a few Muslim elected officials, we all know that Christianity is the religion that rules the land. Witness the RNC. And let agnostics and atheists beware! For a individual to come out publicly as a nonbeliever is the kiss of death. No-one currently serving in the Senate or House of Representatives admits to being atheist or even agnostic. Rep. Pete Stark (D-Calif.), the only openly avowed atheist, left office in 2013; Rep. Barney Frank (D-Mass.) only came out as atheist after he had left office. No-one atheist has ever been elected to the Supreme Court. There are still states where it is AGAINST THE LAW for an atheist to hold public office.

    One of the many things I liked about Bernie was that I DIDN’T hear him talk about his faith. I never heard him say anything about how he belonged to this or that synagogue, how much god meant to him, etc. etc. Of course, he IS Jewish, and we tend to talk and think about religion differently than Christians. And, to give Hillary her due, she doesn’t beat you over the head with a religious schtick (pun intended), either. I think she mentions it about as much as she has to.  She might have her personal beliefs,  but I’m pretty confident that the government she runs will not be faith-based and  that the wall of separation between church and state will be respected. And that, I’m afraid, is about as much as we can ask for, given the current furor and frenzy that seems to sweeping the land.