another year gone but what does it mean
my heart broke at her death his and even my own
this happens each moment so not a good measure
ground that echoes each heavy step does not hold me
I fall through endless lives to walk this street
and carry all the time I have but here
do you need it
I fill your hands to overflow with eons and the sound of love
don’t blink
should I hear a voice in this turbulent wind
I would laugh and ask it to sing
sermons already abound in this world
wisdom too can be found if sought
joy always seems in shorter supply
so give us a wild song to which we can dance
later when we’ve gone to sit by the fire
then we will ponder the mystery of it all
some things I learned that will not leave me
although I can sometimes leave them
the weight and shape of loneliness
a piece of furniture that travels easily
now hidden away in a back room
still I have opened the door after a walk
to find it sitting next to a table
where I’ll let it be for awhile before storing it away
the fragility of existence
a book whose pages I turn again and again
having found that the story ever changes
the ending certain but the how of it unknown
the unexpected gifts of love and kindness
these I keep on full display
scattered around as constant reminders
ready at hand if someone has need
they are the oddest of all, I’ve found
by the giving away they only increase
the world displays itself in starkness, a noir landscape
sky that luminous gray, the inhale before a storm
trees more cadaverous than ever, suited to ravens and crows
pavement black with remnants of rain, foretaste of what will come
wind rises suddenly, shattering the calm into a frenzied beauty
road cracks that imperfectly echo spindled branches disappear
rushed to gone by bulleted rain sent from louring clouds
stickled limbs themselves whip about in such agitation that birds depart
and a shudder of sound moves up and down the ridge
then as if by the wave of some unseen magical hand
this stills and becomes an ordinary winter morning
alone in the barren field
eyes grey as the winter sky
hands roughened by the work of time
she lets all she has known go
the house burned in the night
cinders now and drifting ash
stories carried away by the smoke
no more need of those
her heart too she has filled and emptied
given away to all in need
now she rests without want or forethought
sits on the cold hard ground
one breath, another, then one more
a faint smile, surcease
one man so incandescent with rage
he abandoned his car in the middle of Main
so he could scream and gesture rudely
at the woman behind who offended somehow
she returned his shouts with harsh words of her own
more prudently through an open car window
back and forth the insults ever louder, the voices more furious
until a town employee intervened to enable traffic’s flow
and perhaps prevent them coming to blows
there, surrounded by ornamented greenery and glittering bells
celebrating peace and goodwill towards all
a snarling beast come to claw
each unwise movement or unwary breath
rakes me with ferocious speed
stops me and makes me blind
for a moment not existent at all
I had forgotten this lesson
offered by overwhelming pain
the shattering of self again and again
the unexpected intensity a kindness granted
this a valued reminder
and the people that walk beside the tracks
in the colder hours of these cold days
shoulders bent against the harsh wind
hands tucked into pockets
coats thin against the bitter chill
these the often unseen
the rest of us do not take notice
ordinary lives rest on the lives of others
not lightly but with crushing weight
do we be less heavy a burden
do we even begin to see them
do we recognize we are them
what happens when someone shrugs
and we all come crashing down
as a child I learned that time
was not the order claimed by the clock
but some more malleable thing, viscous and pliant
like gumbo clay after a hard summer rain
the afternoon hours hung across the sky
dripping their minutes into the hot humid air
so slowly that they stretched into forever
and even the restless ocean became still
I let my mind quieten then, became eternal
again and again with each breath
found the end and begin of all creation
no birth no in between life no death
just this one moment, just this
the pavement slick, darkened by fog and rain
leaking like oil from a damaged sky
firmament punctured by some sharp wing-tip
a bird careless as it wheels in surveying flight
an unwise deer skids into a flail
then falls into an ungainly heap of legs
lives to right itself and flee
into more hospitable grass, glistening blades
still soaked by dawn’s brief shine of light
there to pause for one considering glance
before disappearing into the mercy of distant trees